Note to self: Find new haircut place.

Crazy hairstylist, laughing, as cord from buzzer wraps around my neck: I'm so sorry! I'm not trying to kill you! ... strangle you.

Highlight of the day

[during conference call with outside consultant, who mispronounces common industry acronym]
Employee, not realizing he's not on mute: Are we paying for this?!?
[awkward silence]
Employee: I mean... I love you guys!